Your daily laugh as requested sent to you with the intention of
brightening up your day!
Why not give someone else a laugh. Forward this e.mail to
everyone you know.
It is possible that you will have received your daily laugh from
another source or will have been added to our mailing list at the
request of a friend or colleague.
We realise that some may not appreciate being added to our
mailing list without prior consent. With this in mind we are now
asking anybody that wishes to be added to the mailing list to
If you wish to subscribe (including those that have already
subscribed) then please send a blank e.mail to one of the below
addresses that best describes where you are from.
Those that do nothing will automatically be removed from the list
I thank you all for your anticipated co-operation.
Now for today's jokes!!!!!!!!
A man walks into a dentist's surgery.
"How much do you charge for a wisdom tooth to be removed?"
"I'm not paying that much! Can't you do it for less?"
"Well...if I don't use anaesthetic I could lower it to £70."
"That's still too much."
"OK...if I don't use any electricity and I just pull it with a
pair of pliers that'll cost £20."
"Nope - still too much."
"Right, I suppose I could get a student in - he could do it with
no anaesthetic and with pliers and that will only be £5."
"Brilliant! Book the wife in for Monday!"
There was an alien couple and a human couple, they all got
together and decided to see what it would be like to have sex
with each others partners.The human wife and the alien husband
went off together.....
They ended up at a hotel and the alien guy drops his pants,
and boy is he ready....all 2 inches of him. Well, the human
lady told him that she really didn't think that this would work
out, that he was just entirely too small. Well, the alien says,
Watch this. He proceeds to smack himself in the forehead and
wouldn't you know it, he penis grows four inches,
the human lady tells him - That's nice, but I still don't think
it will work. So he hits himself in the head a couple more times
and before to long, his penis is twelve inches long. That's
fine and dandy she tells him, but it's still only a half an inch
thick...So the alien starts tugging on his ears and with each tug
his penis grows wider and wider till the human lady just can't
stand it any more and they have a fun filled night of sex.
The next day they trade partners again and the human husband asks
his wife, well, how was it? She tells him it was the best sex
she's ever had, it was awesome. The wife asks the husband how
it went with having sex with an alien woman, he said, well, it
was kind of weird, all night long she kept hitting me in the
head and tugging on my ears!!!
During a routine physical, a doctor tells his patient to drop his
pants. After the examination, the doctor says to the man, "You
have the filthiest balls I've ever seen!"
The guy goes home to his wife and says, "I want to talk to you
She replies, "Not now, I've been so busy lately that I haven't
had time to wipe my arse!"
He says, "That's what I want to talk to you about."
There was a father who was very proud of his three daughters.
Every night he took a stroll around the house to make sure
everything was all right.
One night when he was doing his stroll, he could hear laughter
coming from his youngest daughter's room. He stood there for a
while and thought about this, but reached the conclusion that he
could always ask her tomorrow, instead of bothering her at this
time of the night.
When he reached the window of his second daughter, he could hear
her crying. He thought about this too, but ultimately he decided
to ask her tomorrow and continued.
There were no sounds at all coming from his oldest daughter's
room, and he then went to bed, satisfied.
The next day, when they all were gathered around the breakfast
table, he said to his youngest daughter "I heard you laughing
last night, as I walked past your window. Why was that?"
She answered "That's because you taught me to laugh when someone
was making me happy..."
He then asked his second daughter "I heard you crying last night,
why was that?"
She answered "That's because you taught me to cry when someone
was making me hurt..."
He then told his oldest daughter "I didn't hear anything from
She said "That's because you taught me not to talk with my mouth
A man went into a chemists looking for condoms. Unfortunately he
didn't know what size to get. The pharmacist asks him, 'Would you
like to find what size you are, Sir?'
The guy agrees and the pharmacist leads him into a room with a
board. The board has many differently-sized holes in it. The
pharmacist leaves, allowing the guy some privacy to match up his
dick with the right hole.
Three hours have gone by and the pharmacist wonders what is
taking so long. So, he knocks on the door and sees if the guy is
alright. The guy says, "Forget the condoms, I think I'll take the
Wishing you a great day!